Once Upon a Bang!
by Night-Being
Summary: ItaDei Week. Once upon a time a certain prince set upon a quest to find a princess worthy to be his bride. However, prince Charming was never much into princesses... Luckily for him, another prince seemed to feel the same. T-rated for language!


**_Written to honor ItaDei Week 2015!_**

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Once upon a time in a faraway land, there lived a great beauty. Locked in the highest chamber of the tallest tower of a palace the beauty waited for a hero to come and slay a fire breathing dragon guarding the palace. Long years the beauty waited. Longingly gazing out of the tower window at the fields and meadows under the destroyed castle, wishing for a prince to come at last.

And after many years of waiting… a certain prince happened to be just around the corner. Prepared to kill the fearsome beast. Prince Charming they called him. Which, of course, was merely a title he was given by his people. His true name though, would stay hidden just for a little longer.

Prince Charming was considered to be the greatest warrior of his era. He was loved by all his servants and his entire family very much. He was acknowledged for his kind heart and graceful nature. Many rumors ran within the folks of his realm. Some believed that he was so smart that he could win a war in a single night. Others claimed he was so handsome that every lady in the kingdom wished to steal his heart.

 _To put it a tad simpler… he was fucking awesome! Ehm…_

 **…**

Dashing through thick forests and dry plains prince Charming made his way towards the beauty's palace. For seven long days and seven restless nights he travelled on the back of his white horse. Unstoppably and without any break he journeyed through the land. His mind set on only one quest – to save the princess imprisoned in her tower. The trial had been given to him by his father, who found his heir old and ready enough to attain himself a proper wife-to-be. There was no better bride than the one whose life had to be earned through a dangerous challenge. His oldest son would gain reputation along with a beautiful fiancée, the king thought.

The sun prodded its hot beams into the prince's silver armor. The plate shining and sparkling in the bright light, partly mirroring the passing landscape. Not a scratch had ever been made on the neatly polished plate for the prince was a skillful swordsman and tactician. The metal clanked with every gallop of the strong horse, the animal sprinted straight forward with no signs of exhaustion, obeying the prince's stirring orders.

The castle could already be seen on the horizon and the prince set his beautiful dark eyes to the far, observing the half wrecked and fire destroyed palace. What surely used to be an astonishing fortress had fell into ruins by the hand – or maybe rather mouth – of a frightening monster. There the end of his journey would finally come to be. The remains of an enormous building crept closer with every jump of his horse. The prince grew restless. Would the infamous dragon be awake? Would he be asleep?

When the prince neared the bridge over a canal that run around one side of the castle, he jumped down from his horse and let it free. The well trained animal would trot towards the meadow close by and then come rushing back on a single whiz.

The prince entered the palace through a half destroyed gate. The poor wood was marked with black burned spots and had some of its metal parts ripped out by the sheer strength of fire. He drew out his sword and held it ready to attack while he proceeded to lurk through the castle corridors. As silent as he tried to be though, the plate armor clanked softly with every careful step.

The prince continued through the long halls, watching for any kind of suspicious movement. The helm of his armor not providing such a good view, but it was needed for his own safety. He aimed his steps towards what he thought to be the path to the highest tower of the castle.

Then suddenly a deep voice ripped him from his focused stance. "Who the fuck are you?"

The prince slowly turned around, not expecting a dragon to be able to speak nor ask him who 'the fuck' he was. He came face to face with a young person around his age. His helm obscured vision seemed to confuse his sight though. Judging by those beautiful golden hair and soft lines in the person's face the prince assumed that he was talking to a woman, which, of course, didn't fit with the rich tone of the rather manly voice.

The prince hesitated. "Pardon me?" he asked softly, not really knowing what else to say.

But it was enough to make the other talk again. "Don't pardon me, you weirdo! Why did you break in here?"

"I – uh." The prince wavered and recalled going through the very much damaged and opened gate. He honestly didn't expect that entering a burned building that should be occupied only by a princess held against her will and a dragon could be considered a break in. He didn't want to be rude though and so he put his sword back into the sheath and took down his helm, then he bowed. "My name is Uchiha Itachi, son of Fugaku of the Uchiha kingdom. I'm looking for a fair maiden imprisoned in this palace."

Azure blue eyes blinked at him in confusion. Only now had the prince the opportunity to look at the odd person properly. And once his gaze fell upon the man, Itachi had the feeling that he wouldn't be able to stop staring for quite some time. He had never seen a more captivating human being.

The unknown person kept giving him dumbfounded what-the-fuck look for few more seconds before a melodic chuckle bubbled up. "Hate to disappoint you, but no fair maiden lives here."

Staying true to his composed nature the Uchiha heir answered with plain. "I see."

Silence settled between them and as it dragged on it gradually turned rather awkward. Until the blond sighed in annoyance and swung with the crossbow he was holding to place it on his own shoulder. "What now? Do you expect me to swoon or start talking in verses? Go back where you came from," he said, staring intensely at the intruder, expecting the prince to simply turn around and leave.

"I'm afraid I cannot," the prince breathed out sadly. Slightly disappointed with the whole outcome.

"Why?!" the blond man demanded harshly. Irritation shining from his unusually blue gaze.

"I cannot return to my father without a betrothed," Itachi said simply.

Blond eyebrows raised high on the man's forehead. "And you came _here_ of all places to search for one? What the hell have you heard of this place?"

"Well," the prince inhaled and began to explain. "I have heard that a great beauty lives here, locked up in the highest tower. Guarded by a fearsome, fire breathing dragon and waiting for a prince to rescue her."

"Yeah, well as you can see that's a load of crap," the man scoffed.

"Hn," Itachi nodded. "I guess that indeed means no princess…"

A shook of head. "Nope."

"And no dragon either."

"Hah, definitely no dragon."

"No princess and no dragon" the prince muttered under his breath.

"How dumb are you? Like I said. Just me…" the blond barked, beginning to frown dangerously.

But then the prince sighed once again as if a burden was taken off his shoulders and smiled softly. "Well, thank goodness. I honestly have no knowledge about fighting dragons." He undid the belt holding his sword in place and threw it away. The metal sheath clanked on the charred carpet and stayed lying there. The prince looked at the beautiful man and bowed again. "If it's not too upfront of me, may I ask your name and maybe for some refreshments? I have been traveling for a very long time. I can pay you for your hospitality."

"The name is Deidara," the blond hummed still glancing at the thrown away sword. "And sure, whatever…," he shrugged and turned around only to turn right back with an index finger in the air. "No need to pay me, but I do have a condition!"

"Yes?"

"Take down that annoying piece of junk. It's rattling like a scarecrow and it's fucking irritating." He gestured towards Itachi's armor and turned around one more time, giving the prince some privacy.

Itachi quirked a questioning eyebrow at Deidara's back, but he had to admit that the armor was quite uncomfortable and so he began to take it off right in the spot he stood. Soon all the plate parts were thrown on the floor with a loud clank. "All gone," prince Itachi announced and stepped next to Deidara, dressed only in a simple linen clothes. This way it was much better and he could move freely, so he was partly thankful to Deidara for his request.

Deidara glanced his way curiously, looking just a second longer than was normal in Itachi's opinion. "Cool, now follow me," Deidara said and began to march his way through the burned castle.

The prince followed without a comment. He was used to people ogling him, being the prince and all, and it didn't usually bother him nor stir any reaction, but this extraordinarily beautiful man managed to cause a tiny shiver. Why that happened Itachi could only wonder.

As they walked through the castle the prince noticed that Deidara was guiding him through halls which looked less and less damaged. The glassless windows changed into proper ones and the rich blue carpet gained its vivid color again. This must have been the part of palace which Deidara actually occupied for it was clean and as beautiful as if a real royal family lived here.

Looking at the crossbow casually placed on Deidara's shoulder Itachi began to question where all the trust he apparently felt towards this person came from. He had an impression that he might have met him before, but thinking logically about it, it wasn't possible. Itachi met many fair and attractive princesses and princes in his lifetime, yet none of them could be compared to the beauty Deidara possessed.

"Tea?" Deidara asked as he entered the kitchen, ripping prince Itachi straight out of his musings.

The prince nodded gratefully before answering. "Yes, thank you."

"Sure." Deidara threw the crossbow on the large wooden table and made his way towards an old looking stove. "Though I don't have much to eat. I was just about to go hunt for some hares when I saw you waltz inside my castle and I had to go back to tell you to fuck off… look how that turned out," he chuckled and glanced to Itachi's side only to add. "You're actually the first one to come here."

After comfortable seating himself by the massive table, Itachi looked around. "That's strange," he murmured under his breath, curiously looking around before his gaze fell back to meet Deidara's.

Twinkle of mischief flashed in the man's blue gaze. "You think? Well didn't you hear? A freaking dragon lives here. _Duh_. Not everyone is as crazy as you are," he chuckled and went back to making the tea.

"I am not crazy. It was an order given by my father," Itachi said matter-of-factly, needing to raise his voice a little to be heard over Deidara's clanking and rummaging.

Deidara shook his head in disbelief. "Yeah. Your father must be a great guy if he sends his son to fight a dragon just to get a girl. My family wasn't any better though. Few years back they wanted me to marry some annoying chick. I freaked out and… well. You see what happened to the castle." He stopped with his motions for a while, as if reminiscing.

"I'm sorry to hear that," Itachi whispered softly, trying to soothe the beautiful man, thinking the memory might have saddened him.

But when Deidara turned to face him, he wore the brightest grin. "Pff, don't be. They are all alive. Living in our other palace by the sea. While I have to stay here as a punishment for what I've done," he ranted and frowned. "Tsch. I bet the whole princess and dragon shit was my sister's idea… she loves to throw pranks. Little brat."

Deidara placed the freshly made tea in front of prince Itachi and threw in a bowl of biscuits, then before Itachi could even thank him properly the blond was speaking again. "But why didn't your father just throw a ball or something? I thought that's how it's done nowadays."

Itachi couldn't help but smile at that. It seemed Deidara lived here all alone for quite a while. He obviously missed the opportunity to talk to someone. "Actually, they have done that several times. I didn't seem to fancy any of the princesses though. My mother says I might be cursed." Itachi explained, thinking that he would gladly keep Deidara company for a while longer, and provide him with as many conversations as Deidara would want. The thought of staying here for more than just tea and biscuits beginning to take form inside his head.

"Cursed? I've heard there is a cure for that. It works every time," Deidara said and a teasing smirk curved up the line of his mouth. He seated himself by the table opposite of Itachi.

Itachi snapped his eyes up from Deidara's appealing lips. "What cure?"

The smirk grew even wider until it changed into a grin. "A true love's kiss."

A brief pause followed by a confused frown. Itachi placed aside his tea, thinking that Deidara might have gone mad. But then something clicked. "Where do I get one?"

Deidara stretched casually in his chair. "Oh, well… it's your lucky day. I have few of them still stored." He leaned back, observing prince Itachi intently.

And Itachi returned that straight gaze with the same intention growing in his mind. "How much do they cost?" he asked and stood up from his chair, then walked around the table and stopped right in front of Deidara.

The blonde stood up as well, not caring that they were mere inches apart he kept facing the prince. "Would you seriously pay me beforehand?"

This time it was Itachi who smirked. "Of course not. What if it won't work?"

"I see your point," Deidara breathed out and let his stare stroll down Itachi's face until it landed on his approaching lips.

The kiss was soft and for some it might be short, but the moment Itachi parted from Deidara's delicate lips, he knew he wasn't going anywhere.

"Did it work?" Deidara whispered and his breath fanned over Itachi's face.

"I don't feel any different," the prince answered, his hand sneaking its way around Deidara's waist.

Deidara let himself be brought closer and wrapped one arm around Itachi's neck in return. "Well then we should try again…"

Itachi let out a soft chuckle. "How many of them you have again?"

"Well… There might be more than few…" Deidara smiled and joined their lips in a kiss that lasted for much longer.

 **...**

Now, you see, kids… prince Charming had never found his princess nor slay any dragon. Actually he had never returned home to rule the kingdom in the first place. All that because in the destroyed castle he had found something far better and more precious than he could ever imagine.

Another prince – _Deidara_.

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-The End-


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